Disclaimer: These are my most inner thoughts laid out for the world to see. No edit, no scripts, no plastic, no gloss, no strings attached. Truth in rare form. Enjoy!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Can Men and Women be JUST Friends?

Steve Harvey believes men and women CAN NOT be just friends. Hill Harper believes men and women CAN be just friends. They are both educated black men with different opinions based on their own life experiences. But, the question still remains.

According to Dictionary.com, the definition of friend is "a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard." Let's focus on "feelings of affection." In what context are they referring to in "affection" and what are you "feeling" when it comes between friends of the opposite sex? Such a touchy subject amongst men and women of today's society. When you turn on the television and see movies such as Brown Sugar, you just have to wonder can Men and women really be JUST friends. 
Written in Psychology Today "The belief that men and women can't be friends comes from another era in which women were at home and men were in the workplace, and the only way they could get together was for romance [...] Now they work together and share sports interests and socialize together." They go on and say that although it may be tricky, men and women today can be close friends.
Friends are those whom our faults are safe -G.K. Chesterton

My Opinion, it is my Blog right? 
You have to ask yourself, "What is a solid friendship?" "What is a genuine friendship." Yes I do believe opposites attract. I do believe that love is a friendship set on fire. Love can catch anyone by surprise, when you least expect it. Love defies all rules in any book you can possibly imagine. Love is tricky, but I believe Love exposes the meaning of friendship; an opportunity to meet someone that you get to know from ground zero without wearing a facade. To me, friendship is a choice. I believe men and women CAN be just friends DEPENDING on their mindset and their maturity level. Those are VERY important pieces to the puzzle that I believe people overlook. This topic can be debated over forever. What do YOU believe? 


  1. Can Men and Women be just friends? My answer is yes and no. There are certain specific conditions under which BOTH parties can keep their friendship, JUST as a friendship. This is possible when both parties are gay, if both parties are physically unattractive to each other, or if the two have grown up together as "play" brother and sister. Otherwise, one party is going to find the other attractive and will use the friendship, subtly or blatantly, as a ploy to become more than friends.

    The interaction between humans, I believe, is a mixture of mental and physical connections. Mental interactions that are a synthesis of our thoughts, perceptions, and interpretation of words and actions, which for the most part, we can control. Physical interactions that are the result of responses to sensory cues, pheremonal, and hormonal triggers, things that we cannot control. In my opinion, once we look at interpersonal relationships between men and women as a combination of those two types of interactions, it becomes clear to see why things can get so confusing when it comes to keeping things as "JUST" friends.

  2. I feel that men and women can be JUST FRIENDS, depending on who it is, sometimes when you have a friend of the opposite sex and you learn them, you spend time with them, and your around them for so long, someone will catch feelings, i know because it has happened to me, I met a guy and we started off as JUST FRIENDS, and the more we got to know each other the more our feelings started to grow for one another, then we became more than just friends. But on the other hand i have plenty of guys that i am just friends with. So, yes it is possible for men and women to be just friends.

  3. Men and women CANT be friends if you're a woman and your friends name is Morris Chestnut!

  4. Men and women can be JUST friends. But it more often than not results in, uhm, other activities(?). LOL. If a man and a woman enter a friendship and have absolutely no romantic intrest in that other person, it is absolutely possible. However, in commonly defined friendships, the two people will spend time together, share intimate things with each other and be vulnerable with each other. These are the details that eventually turn friendly feelings into feelings of desire and sometimes love. I mean, what girl doesnt want to fall in love with her best friend. Those are the types of relationships that last. Amazing huh? So while its possible for men and women to be close and develop a beautiful friendship, the two have to be on the same page and understand that its a friendship, in order for other complications not to arise.

  5. I believe that men and women can be friends because I have a lot of male friends and we don't look at each other as someone that we would "hook up" or start a relationship with. I'm like one of the guys to them and I'm always looked out as the younger sister or that one friend that nobody likes to screw over.

    It's possible as long as the line has been drawn between both parties as of what is acceptable and what isn't

  6. Men and Women can be friends...but it is the category that you placed them in...I consider my co workers that are the opposite sex my guy friends...but often times I find it to be better to get away from that physical chemistry if I call one of my guy friends a "brother" and it changes the relationship completely, to be more accepting. Men and Women can be friends, SEX just complicates everything....you know that emotionl attachment and what not...lol NEXT TOPIC!

  7. ok, here is my more serious response to this topic.

    Men and women CAN be friends!

    Some like to think that men and women can't be friends if there's any type of attraction on both parts because they will act on it. I'd have to disagree. If one of either parties is strong enough to fight their flesh (desires etc), then yes men and women can be friends!

    It's really just a matter of a person's willpower. I've had plenty of good looking male friends, but because of my appreciation of our relationship (as friends) I chose not to act on or pursue the friendship for anything more than what it already was.

    People like to believe that men and women cant be friends, thats because they want to take the easy road and make more out of the friendship. If you have a fine friend and you value what they are to you as a friend, you will fight to keep it that way, if you really want to. I think our selfishness gets in the way of our decision making sometimes.